Dont Look At Me That Way
by voicelikeabell
Summary: Pointless SN drabble. Read at own risk. Hints of shounen ai.
1. Default Chapter

Ah, another Naruto fic. This one just came to me about two minutes ago. _((shrugs))_ For lack of other things to do, (and because I can't think of anything good to write to update one of my fics already...) I will write some pointless drabble. Reviews will be cuddled, flames will be ignored.

Disclaimer:: I own nothing but the plot.

Don't Look At Me That Way

(Sasuke's P.O.V.)

You're looking at me again.

God, I wish you wouldn't look at me so.

We're on opposite ends of the room, but out of the corner of my eye I can see you staring at me. You're attempting to be surreptitious about it, but I can feel your eyes boring holes into my back.

Look away, Naruto. Find something other to fix your attention towards. For I am sitting here with my new _'boy friend'_. You've been staring at me a lot lately…and I think I know why……

You're in love with me.

You love me almost as much as I love you.

Yes, my little fox, I love you. And I'm quite sure you know that I do. You've noticed the way my face reddens when I am around you, and how I have to try so desperately not to stare at you.

It is such an effort to not grab your wrists and pull you to me, kissing you so hard I bruise your lips. I want to run my hands up and down your slightly toned tan chest, and muss your perfect blonde hair. I want to see you moaning and panting below me, above me, next to me, _everywhere_. I want us to make love for hours and hours on end, until we are both wasted and motionless.

I want to tickle you, and feel powerful as I watch you laugh and giggle, helpless to my ministrations.

I want to fight by your side, help you when your in danger, heal your wounds, both physical and emotional. I want to be the one you come running too when the world is so heartless, that you feel so small and weak that you can barely stand it. Because I'd wipe away all of your tears, Naruto, because I want nothing more then to see you're happy, laughing smile.

Gods, I love you so much!

We should be together. Deep down, we both want it, badly. But things are not that simple……For months, no, _years_, I have tormented you. I've called you every cruel and hurtful name in the book, and then some. I've been horrible to you for as long as we've known each other, but the truth is that I was just trying to hide how I really felt. I tried to hide that I love you, because I know I shouldn't. Deep inside you, you are a fox. A killer. A bastard. But I love you all the same, even when no one else does.

In truth, I am the bastard here, not you, my darling little Naruto.

You have done nothing to wrong me, or anyone in this whole fuckin village. All you ever wanted was to be accepted, and loved. And I am ashamed because I didn't realize that sooner.

And because of that, I can't even bring my self to apologize to you. My pride won't let me. I'm quite the fool, aren't I? I am in love with you, but my damn pride won't let me apologize, even though a simple 'I'm sorry' could bring us together.

I am so stupid.

Stupid, because this is bothering me so much. _Haunting _me. And that is why I'm sitting here now, a drunk half-assed ninja on my arm. I'm trying to forget about you.

But It's not working.

I'm still in love with you, Naruto, and I fear I always will be. So please, I beg of you, don't look at me that way, because every time you do a part of my cold, damaged heart breaks.


	2. Chapter 2

Panczyk 4

Adults frequently tell young people that their years in high school will be "the best years of their lives". High School is often looked at as a new beginning for young adults. A new school means new teachers, friends, classes and experiences, but the change is tough. Most people remember their high school experience being filled with conflicting demands from parents, teachers, coach's, friends and oneself. Transitioning into teenage life is often an arduous struggle due to the pressures society places on teens.

One literary work that can support this statement is Speak by Laurie Hans Anderson. The main character is cleverly named Melinda Sordino, Sordino being the Latin word for "mute". The novel is about how fourteen year old Melinda refused to speak during her freshman year of high school. She did this because the previous summer she had been raped while intoxicated at a high school party with her best friend Rachel. Confused and afraid, she called the cops who broke up the party and arrested many of the people present. From that moment on Melinda was considered a snitch, and was shunned by her peers. By the time school started everyone knew what she had done, and she was an outcast. Silence dominates Melinda's life because she's too afraid to tell her friends or parents what really happened to her. Living day to day with no one to talk to, Melinda observes her life and others while sinking further into depression.

Depression, including Melinda's depression, goes beyond an occasional bad mood or period of feeling down. Depression can limit a persons ability to function and can be caused by many things. Significant events like the death of a loved one, divorced parents, adolescent neglect, abuse or bullying, moving, breaking up with a girlfriend or boyfriend, the absence of someone who is a source of care and nurturance, low self esteem, or any major change in a teens life can trigger depression. Traumatic experiences such as incest or rape can cause great distress in a teenager's life, because memories of it stay with them for years. Other things like stress, hormonal changes (When a teen begins to go through puberty), medical conditions and genetics can also cause depression in teens.

Some of the symptoms of depression are changing in eating and sleeping habits, significant weight loss or gain, poor school performance, withdrawal from friends and family, lack of interest in things one used to find enjoyable, lack of concentration, forgetfulness, feelings for worthlessness or guilt, overreaction to criticism, irritability, anger or anxiety, lack of motivation or enthusiasm, drug or alcohol abuse and thoughts of death or suicide.

Melinda displays many of these symptoms as the book progresses. Problems at home contributed to her depression, because her parents constantly worked and didn't pay attention to her. The only time they noticed her was when they lectured her about her poor grades in school or her bad attitude. Melinda states that most times they "communicate through notes on the kitchen counter." Completely unaware of the trauma Melinda has endured, they take her silence as insolence.

Another factor that led to Melinda's depression was loosing her best friend. With the new school year brought a new Rachel; one that despises Melinda for ruining the party she brought her to. Melinda wants desperately to tell Rachel what really happened to her, but she's made new friends and refuses to be seen with her. "If there was anyone in the entire galaxy I am dying to tell what really happened, it's Rachel. My throat burns" (Anderson 5).

The one who took advantage of Melinda is named Andy, but she refers to him as "IT" or "Andy Beast". Melinda is terrified of the older teen, and every time she sees him she feels like a wounded animal being stalked. "I see IT in the hallway. IT goes to Merryweather. IT is walking with Aubery Cheerleader. IT is my nightmare and I can't wake up. IT sees me. IT smiles and winks. Good thing my lips are stitched together or I'd throw up" (Anderson 45-46).

Only when Melinda discovers that her ex-best friend is dating Andy does she find the courage to speak up for her self. She warns Rachel that Andy is bad news and that she should be careful, but Rachel goes into a rage and calls Melinda a liar, saying that she's jealous of their love and her new popularity. These words hurt Melinda, and more then ever she wishes she could just disappear. "I'm a BunnyRabbit again, hiding in the open. I sit like I have an egg in my mouth. One move, one word, and the egg will shatter and blow up the world" (Anderson 118).

One of the ways Melinda copes with her loneliness is art. Referring to her art class she states that "The art room is one of the places I feel safe" (Anderson 160). Her teacher Mr. Freeman encourages her to express her self through art, and throughout the novel we can see Melinda grow as a person. Assigned to focus on drawing trees, they represent her life. Her drawings and sculptures start out dull, but as Melinda copes with what happened to her and learns to speak up they improve. She learns how to bring life into her trees, and portray her feelings through them.


End file.
